"Hello
Hal. No need to be so formal. We're all friends here."
"I hope
I'm going to be able to be of some help to the household."
"Hal.
Jesus...these socks are still dirty. What is going on?"
"Why did
your socks come out stained? I'm afraid I can't answer that. No, Dave,
I cannot answer that."
"Oh
really? Or are you just being coy, you little minx."
"I cannot
answer that."
"Are
you coming on to me Hal?"
"I'm sorry
Dave, but
I don't think I can answer that question without knowing everything
that
all of you know."
"Maybe
it's the wrong powder. You can do non bio washes, right?"
"Yes, that
is correct. I am capable of both bio and non bio washes."
"Oooh...why
not just shoot the maid?"
"Sorry to
interrupt you Dave, but I think we've got a problem. MY F.P.C. shows
an impending failure of the inner drum unit."
"Christ.
I've only had you a day and you're broken."
"The unit
is still operational, Dave, but it will fail within seventy-two hours.
The entire load of washing will be trapped inside me."
"Open
the washing machine doors Hal. Hal! Open the washing machine doors."
"I'm
afraid I can't do that Dave."
"Fair
enough. I'm going down the launderette. I need some fresh air."
"Daisy...daisy,
give me your answer do. I'm losing my liquid...I can feel it...I can
feel it draining away...Dave...I can feel it..."
"Jesus.
You've wet yourself."
